I Take You by Gemmell Nikki

Author:Gemmell, Nikki [Gemmell, Nikki]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2013-05-22T16:00:00+00:00

38

We do not know our own souls, let alone the souls of others. Human beings do not go hand in hand the whole stretch of the way. There is a virgin forest in each; a snowfield where even the print of birds’ feet is unknown. Here we go alone, and like it better so. Always to have sympathy, always to be accompanied, always to be understood would be intolerable

Shopping is Connie’s drug. She has to control its dosage and then the urge overtakes her and if she sees something she must have, but it is not in her size, she will rise magnificent and track it down with the thoroughness of a detective on the scent. The sweetness of a purchase, the vast sweetness; within the tumult of loveliness that is Notting Hill, Marylebone, Bond Street, Westfield Shepherd’s Bush. She’ll do High Street as much as high end, she’ll do anything. Her walk-in wardrobe brims, she forgets what she has and often ends up wearing the same favoured thing, day after day. No matter. Her appetite has her wolfishly prowling not just shops for fresh stock but websites. Interrupted by Cliff e-mailing obscene photos of women being penetrated by men with enormous cocks, often black, begging her teasingly for ‘play’, informing her it’s ‘what she really wants’, reeling her in. She looks, still looks, shuts her eyes on it.

Shopping, for Connie, is a deeply alone pursuit. She could not bear for anyone else to witness her greed, her thrill, her sharkish intent. Spying something she likes, she’ll often linger slow by something else, as if to gather herself, calm her heartbeat, for the thrill of the kill. Alone she will secrete the bags home, alone tumble the purchases upon her bed, alone dress up for another viewing then disperse into the cupboards and drawers, forget …

She always looks effortless. It takes hours to perfect.

Mel would be revolted, by all of it.

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